I would just like to let everyone know that I asked my mom's permission before I made fun of her here. She knew what to expect because she knows me, and she laughed hysterically at each post. I love my mom dearly, and would not be a Christian or a missionary without her influence, but she is a lot of fun to tease because she is such a good sport. I wanted to be fair to her in all this, so I interviewed her about each weird item, so she could give her side to the story. Read it. You'll like it...
Jessi: Lets start with the "Pet Calming Serum". Tell us why you have that.
Mom: Well, Jocko (her Cairn terrier) has anxiety attacks when thunderstorms come and I am always afraid he is going to have a heart attack, so I called my friend who knows a lot about dogs and she told me about it.
Jessi: Does it work?
Mom: It really does work.
Jessi: Seriously, mom?
Mom: It really does...well at least it helps.
Jessi: What about the George Strait jacket? Why on earth do you still have that?
Mom: Ummm, just because it brings back good memories of your childhood, and I am the one who bought it for you.
Jessi: Good memories? Seriously? Because whenever I remember wearing it, I think about changing my name, and moving to another country. Maybe that is why I am a missionary, who knows?? Also, you should NOT have bought me that jacket no matter how much I begged. You should have been closely monitoring my dork potential and nipped that in the bud.
Jessi: What about the ugly western shirt, and vest?
Mom: That was my dad's, and it was hanging in the closet when I moved in here. He wore it as a costume too. I have a picture of him wearing it. (Background- my grandparent's had a lake house, and when they died my mom bought it and moved in. She also left a lot of stuff they already had in the house. Read closely, you will notice a pattern)
Jessi: Moving on...
Jessi: Ok, since you are no longer Catholic, why do you have the statue of the Virgin Mary?
Mom: Because it was my mother's and I just like it because the hands are so delicate.
Jessi: And what about Irish Jesus?
Mom: That came from my grandfather's house, and that is one of the few things that my dad kept of my grandfather's and that is exactly where it was hanging when I moved into this house. I never thought about it as "Irish Jesus". (Another background tidbit- my mom is obsessed with Ireland. OBSESSED! If you give her anything and I mean anything that is the color green, she will tell you it reminds her of Ireland..."hey mom, I got you a box of Kleenex to replace the box we used up." "Ok, thanks! Oh, and look its green! It reminds me of Ireland!")
Jessi: Really? The red hair and green eyes didn't make you think about Ireland?
Mom: No, The Catholics call it, "The Sacred Heart of Jesus", but I really just kept it for sentimental reasons.
Jessi: You know, you really keep A LOT of stuff for sentimental reasons.
Mom: You are right. Most of the weird stuff I have is for sentimental reasons.
Jessi: So, you are basically blaming your ancestors for all your weird crap?
Mom: No, not just my ancestors. Some of the stuff my friends gave me.
Mom: You know the green bedazzled cross? My friend made that for me. And, Lucy was the one who told me to put the Jesus on it.
Jessi: So you just had a Jesus who was posed as if He was hanging on cross, but not actually on a cross laying around your house?
Mom: Yeah, it was in a box a pictures, I really have no idea why it was in there, but just didn't think I should throw away a figure of Jesus.
Jessi: Some of the Catholic guilt still hanging around?
Mom: I guess, I don't know.
Jessi: Alright, well, let's get to what we have all been curious about- the Buddha. Tell us about Buddha...
Mom: OK, my mother took a ceramics course when we lived in Canada. For one of my school projects, I did a paper on World Religions, so for part of the project I went with my mom to the ceramics class and we made it together...Also, I have all this oriental "decor", so I just thought it went well in here.
Jessi: HA! Mom, you're crazy, but I love you.
Here she is dressed up for her 60th birthday. We threw her a fun surprise party and her sweet friend dressed her up in all this stuff. Later my kids were playing with those novelty glasses and broke them. My mom asked if they could be fixed. I asked her if she was seriously going to keep those and she said yes, "you know for sentimental reasons." Classic.
***Sharon would like me to let everyone know that at the time of this post she is actually 59. We threw her a birthday party early since my sister and I would not be here for her actual birthday. She really has 2 more weeks until she is actually 60, thank you very much.