Friday, April 24, 2015

The Rat Pee Diet

Yes, we are alive in the tribe. Our email hasn’t worked since we got here, so there has been no way for me to blog or write any of you back. We can receive email, and we truly appreciate everyone who has written us to check in, and we have sent multiple responses to all of you telling you how wonderful you are and how much we love you! But…you just haven’t received them yet. You may never receive them- who knows. They may have been eaten by the invisible monster that plucks radio waves out of the sky and devours our data for breakfast.


I am sending this from my co-workers email address that is currently- as I am typing this- working.


Anyway, so we made it in just fine. The flight in was good and I was only slightly terrified and not in full-blown panic attack mode, so that was a huge answer to prayer for all who were praying. Thank you!!!


We came back in to a wonderfully clean house thanks to my coworkers and a lot of broken stuff thanks to the jungle. Our email, our radio, our generator, and then not soon after arrival, our front door knob (we were actually stuck in our house for a while). Also pigs and humans have been using the spring that brings water to our house as a toilet. So life has been interesting to say the least. Actually, it has just been pretty typical tribal life. I am covered in bug bites and have already had one skin infection.  So yeah…right back where we left off. We were definitely annoyed at all this stuff but not surprised. The jungle is just welcoming us back with an embrace in its giant arms that don’t know their own strength. It tells us it loves us to death and then proceeds to slowly crush the life out of us. Sometimes I call it Lenny as a term of endearment and sometimes I imagine shooting it in the back of the head.


But the one good thing that happened with all this negative is that I discovered an amazing new diet. When I was in the U.S. (um that was a month ago, people. ONE MONTH AGO I WAS IN AMERICA) and trying to lose all the weight I gained from large Sonic Dr. Peppers, I saw all kinds of ideas for diets and weight loss. Most were ineffective, but this one works I promise! So feel free to make up your own picture since I can’t add one over email and pin it all you like. Are you ready to get skinny?  Ok Here goes:


You leave your house for a long period of time, and make sure there is a way for rats to get in.


Next, make sure they have access to your oven. They will live in it for a while like it’s Barbie’s dream house and pee all over it.


Finally, move back into your house and every time you cook a delicious and fattening meal for your family you will have stood over that oven for an hour smelling rat pee and lose your appetite. You won’t be able to even look at the food you cooked, much less eat it. It works wonders!!! I would add before and after pictures, but once again…I can’t do that over email.


There you go. A fast and easy way to loose weight with no exercise involved! You’re welcome!

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Second Term Me

We made it!!


We have been on six planes and seven airports and made it all the way to Goroka, PNG.

Our six hour layover in LAX that ended at 2 am our time.

Getting ready to board our 6th plane in 5 days.
It was a loooonnnnngggg but very good trip. We even stopped in Australia to pet kangaroos and hold koala bears.

We spent a couple days buying supplies and reconnecting with missionary friends here on the base. We also spent some time reconnecting with a few enemies.

Everything was going really well. The flights were smooth with no delays, we got all our luggage, we even got an extra flight to bring in food supplies so we would have to starve our first 3 weeks in the tribe. And on that flight, a family with two women and five children that have been marked as witches and on the run for years, were safely evacuated to another tribe.

Then April 1st. Came and we just had to have our own little April Fools joke from Papua New Guinea herself. The whole family was loaded up and buckled in the little mission plane, and just as the pilot was climbing in, our flight coordinator came out to tell us that our co-oworker radioed in saying that our village was completely clouded over and we couldn't come in.

So we unloaded and waited for a better report.

It never came. From 6:45am to 12pm we waited. The weather only got worse in Hewa. It started raining and never stopped. So went back to the guesthouse to try again the next day. (Today. In just a few short hours after I post this)

Yes, we were a little disappointed, but very thankful that we got the news BEFORE we got in the air. And I have to say, that this is a great example of what a furlough can do for a person.

First term me would have been all upset and stressed out about it, but second term me just laughed felt like PNG was just welcoming us back saying, "I haven't changed at all while you were gone."

First term me would have gone down to tribal supply and pulled some clean clothes out of storage grumbling the whole time, but second term me just dug the dirty clothes from the previous day out of the bag we were carrying and made everyone put those back on. (All the girls- including me- only had one skirt and those had to be worn into Hewa, so I couldn't risk someone spilling a huge cup of milk or something on them- sorry to everyone here for our smell yesterday). 

First term me would have thought about all the things that could go wrong the next day if we didn't fly in and what we could do about it, but second term me was just really glad that everything was already done and now I am just "forced" to sit here with nothing to do. (please imagine my sheepish grin here. I don't take selfies because I can't figure out how NOT to have a double chin in them, so you have to use your imagination.)

Also, first term me would have individually crushed everyone of those ants with my fingers because it's personal.  But second term me just took a picture and let them do their thing.

So, there you go. A little break from the crazy can do a person A LOT of good.

We're going to try to fly into the tribe again today, and if email is working, hopefully my next post will come to you FROM HEWA!!!