Friday, July 8, 2011

A different kind of education

I am such a loser. Sorry about my lack of blogs since I have moved to PNG. I mean I am actually here, getting pretty close to being a tribal wife and do not even write about it...sorry. I have been sort of pouty since I found out that there is a 99% chance that we will NOT have internet in the tribe. Yeah, you heard me. So when I actually am a tribal wife I will not be able to keep up the blog with said title. In all my pessimistic glory, I have just thought, "well, I'm gonna have to quit soon, anyway...poor me...thanks for noticin'" (please go back and read the previous quote using the voice of Eeyore as the author intended) Anyway, I am depressed about it, but there's nothing I can do, so I will just write while I can, and when I disappear into the jungle you all can just move on with your lives and find some other missionary wife who actually has internet, who can still blog, and who is funnier and better looking than me. I won't make you feel bad about it. Its not like this was a committed relationship or anything. Oh well.

Anyway, the point of this post is that we are now at MONTH NUMBER TWO and I thought I would share with you all the wonderful things that I have learned in two months of living in Papua New Guinea.

1. I can now distinguish between 3 different types of very similar looking poo: gecko, rat, and roach. I am pretty sure I could get a job in a very specific type of identification.

2. I have learned that I sweat more than the average woman...or man.

3. I have passed this gene along to my kids. Sorry girls! (you can't see the baby in this picture because she is in a puddle on the floor)

4. I have learned that you can make just about anything you want from scratch.

5. I have learned that I really don't want anything bad enough to make it from scratch.

6. I have learned that there are about 1,000,000 species of ants. And if you poison a large trail of ants on your wall, but get distracted and forget to clean them up, then a slightly larger species will be along soon to carry them off for you.

7. I have learned that this saves money on ant poison because the larger ants then die. I will NOT be leaving these ants there for even larger ants to come carry them off, though. I see this soon spiraling out of control and can picture a myself thinking I am in an earthquake only to look out my window and see a Godzilla sized ant coming up the road headed straight for my house.

8. I have learned that I actually like meri blouses. They are comfortable, cool, and I don't have to suck my stomach in when I wear them. Sue me.

9. I have also learned that I no longer care if my family is all accidentally matching. Cause when you are all wearing mumu's you are not sacrificing the integrity of your fashion choices anymore by having them match as well.

10. I have learned that "children's church" in Wewak, just means that the kids run around outside with no adult supervision. Being the paranoid mom that I am...I quickly became the adult supervision.

11.I have learned not to freak out about my kids' mysterious rashes. So before you freak out and take a picture, then make your husband label separate red mark's on the child's face, so as not to confuse the doctor...don't...they may just disappear over night.

12. I have learned that my kids do not share my fear of gross disgusting things in the ocean. (yes, that is Mae with a GIANT sea cucumber in her lap)

13. Or my fear of heights. (I have also learned that if I let my husband take my oldest daughter on a hike to a waterfall and say, "take care of my baby" to him that means "let her jump to her death from a 15 ft cliff into an icy creek)

The End.


  1. Haha, totally with you on the adult supervision of kids. It's similar here in Guatemala.