I am (almost) 30 years old and feel like that makes me a "real" adult. Although, I heard the other day that 40 is the new 20, and if that is the case then 30 is the new 10, so I wanted to share some things that I have learned in these wonderful 10 years that I have spent on this earth. I know you are thinking what could a 10 year old have to offer, but I have faced challenges such as having to pee into a cup roughly the size of a thimble while 9 months pregnant and squatting over a hole in the ground...and I have overcome. With a bottle of Purell, and baby wipes, I have overcome. (I also heard someone say that 60 is the new 30, and if that is the case then I am a fetus, and should not even be writing this post, because who wants to take advice from a fetus??) Anyway...
1. Some people are jerks.
People have said things to me before that were disturbing, offensive, attacking, crappy, and I would spend the next few weeks or months evaluating my life and trying to figure out what I need to do to change it. During on of these instances I told a friend what happened looking for a second opinion and she said, "Oh, don't worry about that- he is just a jerk." He is just a jerk. It was life changing. A huge relief. Some people are jerks, and they say jerky things, and it should have no bearing on your life whatsoever. So, if someone ever says something upsetting to you, first ask yourself, "Is this person a jerk?" If the answer is yes, then shrug it off, go eat a cupcake and move on with your life.
2. Always encourage engaged couples.
When JMG and I got engaged, I was a little paranoid. I loved him and wanted to marry him more than anything,but coming from a divorced family makes you slightly terrified of marriage. What made things worse was all the little comments people made. Most of them were just teasing, but all the references to "ball and chain" and "your life is over" had me in a persistent state of the "deer in headlights" look. But this precious couple helped cure all that. They spent lots of time with us giving us advice and telling us that marriage is the greatest thing in the world. Since they had been married longer than any one else we knew, it meant a lot. It helped me calm down, and some days I wonder if my wedding would have resembled a scene from "Runaway Bride" without them.
3.Never say anything you can't take back.
The same couple also told us this, and we have found it to be great advice. I am being transparent here and letting you know that we are yellers. We yell a little too much at each other and at our kids. But, we do not curse and we do not name call. Other than the volume I think our words are pretty tame, and it is because we hear those words in our heads even when we are angry. (at least I do. I don't know what words JMG hears in his head, and frankly, am too afraid to ask) This is good advice in any relationship. Not just husbands and wives or parents and kids.
4. Don't take yourself too seriously.
The Bible says to consider others better than yourselves (Phil. 2:3) Remembering this helps you too not take yourself too seriously. It is always good to laugh at yourself, because if you are not laughing at yourself then others are probably laughing at you.